WHERE TO STREAM/DOWNLOAD: Bandcamp SoundCloud Spotify, Apple Music, iTunes, Google Play, and Amazon And available to stream pretty much everywhere else LYRICS: Verse 1: Rereading texts Tryna find out where we went wrong So what's next? Wondering if that feeling has been here for long 'Cause I thought if anyone could do it, it would be us And I thought that there wasn't anything we couldn't discuss Lightning strike that came out of nowhere And you've won this damn sneak attack It's been more than a year since I've cried this much Chorus: Sorry that I wasn't enough for you to stay Sorry that it wasn't worth your time Sorry that you still left at the end of the day Sorry that it wasn't worth being mine Verse 2: Can I breathe? With you gone, my chest feels so tight No reprieve Thoughts of you permeate my mind 'Cause everything is entrenched in memories of us And everything indicated a hard-to-find trust Only thing I want is for you to hold me And tell me that it'll all be okay But that's the only thing that I just can't have Repeat chorus Bridge: I think you know All the things I'd do for you 'Cause I know There's no replicating what's between us two I hope you know All the lengths I'd go for you But I know It's something that you won't push through Repeat chorus Click "Read More" for more about the process behind making this song. I wrote this song pretty much in its entirety on Saturday, December 1st, 2018. Without getting into too much detail, the partner that inspired Wires and Waves Tonight essentially had broken up with me the day before. I was super broken up about the whole breaking up thing, and I spent most of Friday night relentlessly crying. In an attempt to make myself feel better on Saturday, I decided to just sit down on my bed and mess around on guitar. The first thing that I came up with was the chorus to encapsulate my primary emo feeling of "I'm sorry that I'm not good enough for you to be with me." I feel like the alternating eighth notes make the melody feel like it's pushing and driving forward, as if the emotions are just pounding overwhelmingly in your head -- like they actually were when I was writing the song. After writing the chorus, the rest came pretty easily. Barring small tweaks in the wording, it was essentially a brain dump of all of the overthinking and awoken insecurities that come as a result of being broken up with -- truly, just wondering what went wrong in the relationship (did I do something wrong? Was there something wrong with me?) and how I could've been so clueless to not see the breakup coming. In particular, the line "lightning strike that came out of nowhere" in the first verse is a reference both to the unexpectedness of the breakup and the fact that the person was a big history buff, including of military history (which should have been a red flag LMAO). That line originally started out as "gotta say that this feels like a blitzkrieg," but that felt like too overt of a reference and generally out of place in the rest of the song's vocabulary. In the second verse, the line "'cause everything is entrenched in memories of us" was inspired by that morning. I thought I had stopped crying, but when I went into my room and saw the Christmas present I had planned on giving, all of the thoughts of "what could have been" slammed back into me, and I just completely lost it again. Fun times! In the bridge, the "lengths I'd go for you" is a reference to Wires and Waves Tonight and the general idea of staying committed to a long-distance relationship: both the literal physical lengths and the metaphorical mental lengths. However, Wires and Waves Tonight's second pre-chorus ("but there's no need for disconnection / just from these circumstances") foreshadows the lines that follow: "but I know / it's something that you won't push through." In Wires and Waves Tonight, I was subconsciously pleading with the person that our relationship was worth the difficulty of a LDR, but in this song (its sequel), they ultimately decide that it isn't worth it. I started out writing this song with basic E minor chords (Em7, Cadd9, Dsus4/F#) since the key of E minor/G major is such a familiar key signature for me to play in, and those particular three chords were some of the very first that I learned on guitar. I originally had played it with a capo on the first fret of my guitar so that it would be in F minor, and I wanted to switch things up -- just as I did with Magic in the Air -- since E minor is generally my default train of thought. However, I later changed it back to E minor when I decided to add a viola part since that is a much easier key to play in, and I instead played Gone with capo on 1 to change it from E minor to F minor. Living up to the title of the sad boi hours EP, Sorry truly is a sad boi song. I cried while writing this song, and I cried while recording the initial demo. Unfortunately for my mental wellbeing, this was not the first breakup. We got back together for a bit (after some generic "I still want to be with you" and "I don't want to hurt you" crap), and then we broke up again -- leading to the next track on the EP, Gone. As a bit of a concept album, remember to listen to the full EP for the ~whole~ story! Blog posts for sad boi hours EP:
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mae-mae hanI'm the singer-songwriter and musician behind this site (and almost everything of my music). I hope you enjoy both my songs and this blog! latest videoarchives
April 2021
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